To add to the comprehension difficulty for Americans, imagine this being read by a television news anchor with an Australian accent (or more properly "Strine").Essendon unveils guernsey for Dreamtime at the G designed by Gavin Wanganeen who says Jobe Watson should keep his Brownlow
Source: Herald Sun.
Here's my attempt to translate it for an American audience:
"The Essendon Australian Rules Football club unveils a special jersey honoring the aboriginal understanding of the creation of the world to be worn at an upcoming game at the Melbourne Cricket Ground and designed by retired team great and now indigenous artist Gavin Wanganeen who says team captain Jobe Watson should keep his Brownlow Medal despite accusations of use of illegal drugs surrounding the club."
But that's probably too long to fit in the space available.
P.S. Long ago, I rooted for the Essendon Bombers (which indirectly is how I stumbled across this headline today), but I quickly learned not to "root" for them at all.